I follow Joyce Meyer on Facebook, yeap we are friends! Tuesday her post hit home.
I have difficulty forgiving one person in my life and you will be surprised that it’s not who you think it is. I have worked very hard and forgiven someone who hurt me badly – someone I trusted who betrayed me, but I will not forget. That person is fine, but I still struggle daily with forgiving this person below.
Yeap, myself three years ago, you seen back then not only did I have questionable hair, but I was rebelling against everything possible. I didn’t listen to the counsel of my parents or my friends, I stopped attending church and was on a downward spiral that ended one year later. In that year’s time I went crazy – my mother and I agree I was not in my right mind. I did many things that were not wise including purchasing a home that has become such a pain for me. I put my trust in someone who was so addicted to meth that there was no saving him, but I was going to fight tooth and nail to save him even though I was loosing myself in the process.
I am happy that I came out of it, but I still struggle on almost a daily basis to forgive myself for that year. I was the essence for co-dependence. I was so not what I am today, actually that girl then makes me want to scream. I could just shake her, she was so stupid!
On the bright side that year I used to help someone else. Once I was out of the darkness I had a conversation with someone who was going through the same exact thing. I don’t remember every word I told her, but I don’t believe I sugar coated anything and then I told her I would pray for her. That one comment – I will pray for you – helped her and changed her path. She emailed me out of the blue last week to tell me thank you. I did that yet I still struggle with the memory of what I was. I must get over it and I working on it and praying for it everyday.