Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Wish I had…

I promise not to cry while writing this…or atleast I will do my best.

I wish I would have known to ask my grandmothers how they did it – how they stayed at home and made it work. I know it was a completely different time them, but still they had to be economical to make ends meet for their households.

Take my Granny for instance born in 1908 and living through the depression already I am sure that she never planned to be a widow with a young son in her 40s. She never thought of re-marrying to help her and her son, no she made ends meet with the small amount of a death benefit my father received and her own will. I wish I knew more. I knew the woman could cook and spent very little on her ingredients. I also know from being the receipt of many of her things that she never threw anything away. She was the queen of re-using. She also sewed her and my father’s clothing while making a little extra money sewing for others with her Singer treadle sewing machine. That was also when material was a lot cheaper then it is now. If my grandmother had a tv there was only one and when color television became available she was the last to buy one. She also didn’t drive a day in her life, so there was no need for a car or gas.

Looking back on my Granny’s life, even though I know for a fact she is where I get most of my drama attitude from, one word comes to mind “simple.” She lived in simple homes with simple furniture. She had (I now have them) simple dishes on her simple kitchen table. Even though I would not have wanted to live through the heartache she went through losing her husband so young, I sometimes wish I could live her life. I long for a world without cellphones and gas tank that costs $80 to fill up.

My Meme’s life looked different, but she had one thing in common with my Granny – sewing and I am so glad they both gave me that gift – it may come in handy soon. My Meme was blessed to have her husband with her for a little longer – he passed at the age of 61, but he lived to raise his children and see all of this grandchildren – to that I am very happy (urgh…little teary eyed). My Meme had three daughters – the youngest and the oldest were ten years apart and my mother landed right in the middle. From what I know my Meme would have been what we call these days a Domestic Engineer, but I am almost positive that she sewed to supplement her income – sewing was big back then. I don’t think there is any easy way to say this…my Phillips grandparents were cheap, thrifty, tight with their money – yeap I think that sums it up. From pictures (and I am sure my mom will correct me) they were a one car family. They lived in the days where my mom and her sisters were safe walking home from school and a stroll to the local grocery store seemed like nothing. My Meme most likely saved money when dealing with food. I know for a fact she is the queen of making up recipes – some were less edible then others, but she still put a warm meal on the table. My mother has also shared with me the horror story of Friday night meal in a can (or maybe pot). You see what ever was left on a plate or in a pot (mainly vegetables) were scrapped off into a mason jar all week and then on Friday it was mixed with some hamburger meat – yum, huh? This is the reason my mother made sure to have plans every Friday night. I really wish I knew what else she did to make ends meet – to raise a happy family, but still make it by on one income.

I know you are probably tired of me harping on staying at home, but typical me until someone tells me there is absolutely no way for it to happen I am going to rack my brain with ideas on how to make it happen. For instance…planting my own vegetables – JAG is laughing since I can’t even keep and ivy alive – canning vegetables for the winter. Cooking from scratch and being very careful with left-overs. I hate to say this, but I would do just about anything.

This is where I should remind you once more to journal or blog. Do something to tell your story, so that your children and grandchildren have it for reference. I know first hand how hard it is to lose my grandmothers’ memories so quickly. Daily I am filled with the “I wish I would have asked…” thoughts when it comes to both of them.

On the baby front – I heard a strong heart beat yesterday and my doctor’s appointment. Things are going well and it made me so happy. In less then a month we will know if I am carrying a girl or a boy. I say girl – just a strong feeling, but we will see.

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